Revision Party (5th)

We had a revision party today! We started by looking at Gwendolyn Brooks’ “We Real Cool” without line breaks and guessing where Brooks might have put them. We then looked at the actual poem and line breaks. The students were so surprised there was a collective gasp! They had wonderful reflections on why Brooks might have made this choice. We then discussed the ways we could use line breaks creatively in our own work. Students chose a previous piece of theirs to revise with a specific goal in mind. We ended with a celebration of our newly revised poems.

This poet revised to try and make their line breaks as surprising as Brooks’ (or as they said “make people mad with my line breaks!”)


is the best. Ramadan

is in Spring. Eid

is in Spring.  I can

smell my mom making spring rolls.  I

get money on Eid. I

get food on Ramadan. Spring’s

weather is like the three bears. It’s



Yourman revised to add similes.



Throwing icicles at your friends like


throwing snowballs like hand grenades

drinking hot chocolate after the war.

Not going to school

watching the best thing on yourube.

Skibidi toilet.

Playing games.

Feeling sick.
Watching anime.

Mariam worked to change the sound of her words to more “bouba” or softer words and to be more specific.



Winter might seem

cold and not

fun but to me

it’s the opposite.

Winter for me

is full of snowball

fights 5 times a

week and building

snowballs every

now and then.

The tase of

the hot cocoa

tastes so chocolatey

and sweet. Sitting

next to the

window, watching

snow fall and

then going out

to play. Winter

is cold, but fun

and I love it.

If I’m busy,

it’s because

I’m enjoying




“Writing poetry makes me feel like I can see myself, like I can see my reflection, but not in a mirror, in the world. I write and I know I can be reflected.”
-Oscar S.

“Writing poetry makes me feel free.”
-Buenda D.

“Writing poetry is like your best friend.”
-Jessica M.