Ah, the joys of revision! As every great poet knows, much of the “work” of poetry takes place through the revision process. For Waters 7th graders eighth week, we talked about some different ways to make a poem better. Sometimes, some strategically added line breaks, a new title, and more simile can open a whole new world of a poem. We read two versions of Carlos Andres’ Gomez’s “Pronounced” before students worked on their own revisions. Take a look below and enjoy!
Ms. Hernandez’ Homeroom
Dear AP, When Will You Come (final)
by Julia C.
Hello? Waiting for you to come
Hello? looking out the window
Hello? waiting at the door
Hello? are you coming
Hello? did you get lost
Hello? you didn’t come today
Hello? I checked your location I don’t see you
When… (final)
by Simon A
When I was 3,
life was free
those times were a blur,
as fast as a flash
A such different time
from today
when everything
was ok
It’s Ok Not to be OK (final)
by Theo R.
as low taper fade as knee surgery
as those who know still wander
as gyatt as rizzy sigma
as chill guy as simon
as god as simon
as papa as tao
as queen as mama
as aria and sydney as sons
as grandchild as chris, ronan, and oliver
as freaky as chris
as absolute cinema as this poem