Colorful Revisions - The Chicago Poetry Center

Colorful Revisions

Although I had planned a haiku lesson for our 7th sessions together, a number of Twain 3rd graders had – in previous weeks – expressed dismay over being unable to finish some of their poems. I decided that we would dedicate time to the process of revising and rewriting. We discussed what it means to look at first drafts of our poems with “new” eyes. Each student selected a poem to revise from one of our previous [six] lessons, and many chose their color poems. I suggested that reading aloud (but quietly) was one way to hear the sound of a poem. We looked for misspelled words, thoughts that were incomplete, played with changing the order of words in a stanza, and looked for ways to use sensory details, imagery, and comparisons (similes and metaphors). During the 2nd class period our process was interrupted by preparations for a fire drill that wound up being postponed! However, kudos! to students who brought their poems to the board so we could work on their revisions in an interactive way.

Mrs. Murphy 3rd Grade

The Color Lilac Dalilah C.

lilac is the smell of picking flowers
in the summer with my mom
and grandma, too.

lilac is the taste of blueberries when I
ask my mom to buy some when
she goes to the store.

lilac is the sound of a cat
purring in my lap.

lilac has the feeling of happiness
and sadness at the
same time.

lilac is the texture of a plushie
being hugged.

My relaxation nights Matilda C.

my relaxation nights are at the
bath house almost every night
in a bath robe fuzzy as clouds
ramen as spicy as a volcano.

I don’t always go to the bath house
I sometimes go breakdancing doing cartwheels
backbends, six steps, and handstands.

I also solve mysteries as hard as a rock.
I can fight the nightmare king
so dreams aren’t boring,
scary, bad, or unhelpful for everyone.

how colors feel to me Jacob S.

blue feels like crying when
I fall on an object
blue feels chill
red feels angry at something
green feels like being good at
a sport
yellow feels like joy
orange feels like being
bored

Yellow Mitzi B.

I see yellow in the sky when people
are happy
Yellow sounds like chimes that bells make
Yellow smells like nothing, really
Yellow tastes like a banana
When I touch yellow the texture is
hard and squishy like a banana
Yellow feels happy when everyone
is happy
Yellow is happiness for me.

Ms. O'Reilly 3rd Grade

Green Landon T.

Green is a deadly
crocodile at a pond
looking for food

I smell green garbage
from a garbage truck
ewww!
I can taste a green crunchy
yummy apple.

“Nope!”
is how I feel about green tea
It’s horrible to me.

I Like Purple Leah S.

I see a purple bear
sitting on a purple chair

Purple is the sweet taste
of smooth grapes on a plate
I eat them one by one
yummy!
I hear the soft purple ocean
at the beach

Purple is fear
when I see a spider crawling
I get scared

I like the smell of purple lavender
on my pillowcase.

Dark Colors Patrick U.

My dog sees dark clouds
and can tell that it is
going to rain.
The clouds are gray
like smoke.